Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Not Quite Buried Alive...

As part of my life cleanse, I chose to spend yesterday rearranging my mess of collections at my mom's house. For those of you that don't know, for the past 8 years I've been collecting random pieces of paper and other bits in hopes of making a banging scrapbook documenting my life. While this seemed a valiant effort, it never came to fruition and instead of using my time to scrapbook, I instead clogged my closet, masking my borderline hoarding disorder....needless to say, it was time for a personal intervention.

As I began my work, I really started to ask myself if it was worth it. There were approximately 7 shoe boxes full of crap and I had no idea what most of it was supposed to signify. I didn't know where to start, or ultimately if it would ever end. All I could think was, I do not want TLC finding these piles 20 years down the road while my kids, being unable to have friends over because I was keeping newspapers from 2000 on the couch, complain that the hoarding kept us buried alive. This kind of motivation told me I could handle it.

It was about 6 PM and considering my whole day was pretty unproductive, I decided to venture down memory lane. To give you an idea of the items I found, I picked a few of the real gems that, unfortunately, I have no idea why I kept.

1. a piece of a tennis ball- perhaps at one point in my delusions of my athletic grandeur, the piece gave me hope that I could slam a ball and rip it like that, or I just thought my boxes of memories was trash

2. an unidentifiable piece of flora- I would like to think it was some sort of flower a guy once gave me, but considering the other flower parts I found were sealed in plastic bags, this prior assumption proved faulty and thus I used gloves to remove it from my memories

3. programs from every Dance Concert from every year I was in high school- all I need to say is that I was never in dance class and never performed in the concerts that occurred twice a year

4. two sets of chopsticks- I don't really need to explain why their appearance in my memory box was alarming

Luckily, all the boxes and scraps took only 6 hours to organize. Since I'm still looking for a job that won't involve me shaking my money maker, this 6 hours was totally worth it.

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